hash trash: Southside 4/13

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

thanks for the cleavage!

thanks for the cleavage!

That is right, Sunday was SOUTHSIDE! Southside is interesting because it starts on Southside time. Southside time is wonderful, who wants to rush on a Sunday? So we chatted and played on the pointless gym equipment at the park. And yes, we had a Virgin at our hash. Wearing a green Monopoly “make it rain shirt”, this pretty much made him instantly accepted.

The hares away’d and soon after we followed. Through a little market, which didn’t smell too bad which was surprising. But anyways, we came to our first checkpoint. It was marked. That was very strange but we felt like we should trust it…….to lead us down a bad trail. After figuring out that nobody had chalk besides the mystery marker, we just had to keep going and hope the people behind figured out the bad trail quickly. Through little streets, we came to our A&D split (assholes and drunks) and crossed a bridge to the clothing exchange. At the clothing exchange, I realized it is getting warmer so there isn’t going to be much on our person to exchange anymore. It will make the summer months very interesting
– After crossing the street a half dozen times and meeting up with the Asshole trail, we ran through some real beauty. The cherry blossoms may have already started to fall but the trees were beautiful nonetheless. The ground was coated with petals and it was so pleasant to go through. It did make the trail harder because the chalk was a similar color to the petals. Following the pack, we ran through lots of people enjoying a Sunday walk, kids riding their bikes and people taking pictures. Not a good place for package and boob checks but a good place for Shamu Shagher to photobomb some angry Adjumas while jumping fence into the shiggy. Through the shiggy we went and followed the rest of trail back to well deserved drinks.

The trail was around 4 miles but didn’t seem to be that long. It went fast and was extremely enjoyable. We migrated to the other side of the park away from innocent kids and concerned looking parents (does that make it a Gypsy Hash?). Circle was awesome with lots of talking and the the virgin’s interpretive dance:
– Scene: I-35s funeral. The Virgin and the fellow players expertly played flip cup at I-35s funeral only to find out that she was not truly dead.
– Was it good? Oh hell no! Though it was entertaining, so it got the job done. Is this now I-35s dream funeral? Oh hell yeah.

Then this PVC tube came out into the circle. This tube looks harmless at first, until it is stuck on the arm of the drinker. It is just long enough that you can’t bend your elbow and so have to raise you extended arm over your mouth to drink the beer. Is it called ‘Robot Arm’? You can see their smug confidence as they are thinking, “I got this.” Or as one cocky hasher (NN Ricky) said, “I have great aim…” As you watch the poor soul, spill beer all over themselves, you thank all your hashy stars that the person up there is not you. But HHIT says they are gender equal at SOUTHSIDE! As all eyes were looking around to see which female would have the honor of getting the tube, as my FRIEND (Zimbab) was scooting away from me and pointing behind my back. True Hashy Friendship. The tube was like a carnival game. Aiming seems impossible from afar and it is when you try it. Beer goes everywhere. If you are lucky, some may hit the back of your throat at 100 miles per hour. Your eyes start to water and your make yourself gag.
– The rest of the circle was kinda blurry by then…

{editor’s notes:
– Hares were I-35 and Hey Oscar/Ungrateful Bitch
– FRB’s were HHIT, TBG and the soon-to-be-named Ricky
– Hashit went to Hey Oscar/Ungrateful Bitch and Ginger Wolverine}

Ending with Hashing Hymn Number 1, we headed to the on-after: a non-existent Korean place which we then crossed the road to Rocky Mountain tavern. I can’t wait until the next hash at SOUTHSIDE!

On-On
MVB

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